Midweek Update

Remember this guy? Anyone? I'm talking about dream boat #1 in this case. So I've had the great pleasure of interacting with this guy seven, SEVEN, times now. I've seen him 10+ times. At trivia, at the train, at a sandwich place by my apartment-- you name it. I've seen him there.

Today a line was crossed. Let me 'splain. I walked down the stairs to the green line to catch my train around 5:30. From what I've learned about Joe (we'll call him Joe), he tends to leave work right at 5:00. I kid you not, I've stayed later at work for the sole purpose of avoiding seeing him at the train. This city is way too small. Of course I end up spotting good ol' Joe, say "mother fucker" under my breath, immediately stop walking, and hide behind a concrete column. Unfortunately, Joe happened to be turning my way right as I saw him. I knew he spotted me. I took out my phone and pretended to be very interested in text messages I'd sent three days ago.

However, Joe does not pick up on social cues, so things such as reading a book or being on your phone do not discourage him. I felt him drawing nearer. I know what you're thinking. Fake a phone call, right? NOPE WON'T WORK. No service down in the T. And it's annoying as shit when people talk on the phone on the train, so I refuse to become one of those assholes.

I waited around for my train for about seven or eight minutes, felt him getting closer and closer, and decided to take my alternate route home instead of waiting for the same train that he was. This route requires me to walk one mile home instead of taking the bus, and it was raining today. That's how desperate I was to avoid this man. I'd rather walk a mile home in the rain than risk yet another awkward encounter with him.

So I hopped on the next train. HAHA! You'll never reach me now, Joe! You'll be stuck waiting for a Lechmere train for at least five more minutes! I WIN! Regretfully I did not win. He followed me on the train. FOLLOWED ME ON THE TRAIN. My heart was pounding. This dude is legit stalking me right now. I knew from previous conversations that he always takes the train to Lechmere and walks home from there. What. The. Fuck.

I, of course, pretended like I never saw him and avoided eye contact like it was my job. But I knew he was still there, probably reading my text message over my shoulder to Sarah which read, "Oh my god he fucking followed me on the train." I was hoping that he wouldn't get off at Park with me, but that's the easiest way to get back to the area where we live. Yes, we work AND live in the same general areas. Lucky me. I got off the train and walked to wait for the red line. I didn't see him get off the train behind me, so I was hoping I lost him. Wrong again.

He "casually" walked past me, acted shocked to see me, and said oh hey! He even said something about how his "supervisor made him stay late today," and that he was "sick of waiting for a Lechmere train." Yeah, ok, and I'm 6'6" and from China. Luckily once the train came, a few people got between us, so I didn't have to talk to him the rest of the ride home. He got off the stop before mine, and I did not say goodbye. Guess I'm staying till 6:00 every day now.

You know, I almost felt sorry for him when I saw him at the bar by himself, and at dinner by himself on a Friday night, but once he started following me home I lost all pity. If you have to follow people around to try to be friends with them, or whatever it is he's trying to do, it's a little bit creepy. I take full responsibility for all of my insensitive/bitchy comments. Haters gon' hate.

FYI since I posted twice this week I get a free pass for the next three. See you squares in May.